Monsters Of The Midwest

The Bears get a win, an ugly one but a win nevertheless.  We drink and break it down. 

Every week, I’m serving one Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish. One Scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident, or whatever else I feel deserves it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

I’ve had very little positive to say about the defense.  Soft coverages at the end of games have cost the Bears a couple of games.  This week, though, they looked great.  They put pressure on Dobbs and even made a tackle or two.  I’ll highlight Jaylon Johnson for our Bearbon this week.  He’s on a contract year and making a case that he should be on the roster next year.  He had a key pass break up leading to a pick, a pick of his own and generally looked like a topflight corner.  Poles needs to sign him up sooner rather than later. Raise two fingers of smoky Southern Bearbon to 33.

In a game where the offense scored no touchdowns and only 12 points, you would expect me to rip them here.  Unfortunately, our burning scotch was clinched before the game even started with the quote from Poles below.  My first job ever was at Wendy’s.  On my first day, I knew that burgers cook on the grill, fries go in the fryer and buns toast in the toaster and I was by no means one of the best 32 Wendy’s employees in the world.  So how does someone holding one of 32 NFL head coaching jobs have to be reminded by his boss that great players should be on the field?  And how do you allow that to continue?  This must be professionally embarrassing for everyone involved. Raise the cheapest whisky you can find to this mess.

Week after week, I’ve pointed out that DJ Moore is a stud.  He’s on a 4 and 8 team who spent 4 weeks without their starting QB and he just went over the 1000-yard mark.  That is a true #1.  Haters be damned.  He needs only 189 more yards and 2 TDs to match his best ever season.  I saw him limp of the field after the game securing catch but I’d put my money on him making it.  Raise a Maryland born National Bohemian to WR1.

At one point, Luke Getsy called the same play 3 times in a row hitting flip on one of them like a 10 year old learning to play Madden. He then called it a bunch more times during the game making it a big part of the 18 throws within 1 yard of the scrimmage line. It was simply infuriating.  I did get me thinking about repetition for our jukebox selection for the week.  The visual essay website “The Pudding” empirically sought out the most repetitive song of all time.  Not just the one that used the same words over and over but the one that felt the most repetitive.  I agreed with their selection.  Hit me up if you agree.

The Bears blow a game they led by 12 with under 4:30 left.  We drink to try to feel better.

Every week, I’m serving one Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish. One Scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident, or whatever else I feel deserves it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

Using Foreman at the goal line and Roschon getting into the mix gave me some hope that the coaches plan to use all the guys in the RB room as assets. Fields getting over the 100-mark rushing is encouraging.  This week’s Bearbon is for the Fields to Moore connection.  They connected for 96 yards but that’s not the headline.  They not having lost a step and Fields making a main eventer throw on their TD is the story.  Raise your heavenly smoky brown potion to them both. 

I believe the game has left Coach Eberflus behind.  I got the stopwatch out on Sanborn’s sack.  It took him 2.45 undisturbed seconds to touch the QB starting 5 yards from the line.  With the league average snap to throw time down below 3 seconds, this is no way to success in the NFL.  Another example is the 2^nd and 4 play with the Bears up 26 – 14.  The CB’s play 10 yards off the receivers and keep dropping deeper.  Goff completed a pass for three, the LB misses the tackle and the gain is 13.  Next play is a TD.  In what world is that any way to win a game? Additionaly, Eberflus played the same soft coverage at the end of the first half and cost the Bears 7.  Pass me the bottle.  This scotch better burn. 

Mina Kimes from ESPN often says that wins are not a QB stat.  They sure aren’t a RB, CB or linemen stat either.  I’ll drink to this team scoring 26 points on a good team with that monster Hutchinson in the line up.  I would have been thrilled with this performance if it wasn’t for the end.  Even special teams got in on the act forcing a turnover.  Raise an El Churro  (dulce de leche brown ale), a fine Miami beer from where Tyrique went to high school. 

Yes, I blame the coaches for the loss.  In my mind this song is exactly what they’re guilty of doing and the best music video ever made.  Play it loud.  Let it all out.

The Bears ran into another not so great team and came out with a win.  Let’s have a drink and talk about it. 

Every week, I’m serving one Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish. One Scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident, or whatever else I feel deserves it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

Foreman has carried the load for this team during Fields’ and Herbert’s absence.  Another 80 yards with a trip to the endzone led the offense.  Moore, though severely underused, still kept on track for a career best year.  This week though we’re like a man in the desert desperate for water.  We’re that man and a pass rush is the water.  Montez Sweat finally brought some semblance of a rush this week with 8 pressures.  Sure, he didn’t get home but it’s more than the Bears have had in a long time.  Something dark and smooth and in a highball glass for this week’s Bearbon. 

You may have expected Bagent to show up for our scotch this week.  Sure, he didn’t play great.  Trenton Gill didn’t have his best game either shanking one at a crucial moment.  It was at halftime that our scotch was clinched with the one of the dumbest coach interviews I’ve seen.  Eberflus saying he has something up his sleeve for the second half.  Dear sir, if you have something that works, use it before your team gets to 5 games under .500.  After the game, he followed it up with another embarrassing answer that the media ate up like it was birthday cake.  Pass me the whole bottle of cheap Jack.

As I keep telling you, I am not for the tank.  I want wins every single time the Bears play.  This win is doubly special though as it raises the chances of the top overall pick to 42%.  I don’t value picks as much as some, but it won’t hurt to have the chance to add a monster to this team.  Raise your Miller Lite to a much-needed win.

Aaron Hutchinson and the Lions are up next.  He’s a game wrecker in every way and probably what Poles had in mind acquiring Sweat.  I don’t expect this one to go well so let’s distract ourselves with an actual hit that has barely a connection to Lions. 

Alvin Kamara does not run over the Bears but they still lose.  Let’s drink and see if it makes us feel better.

Each week, I’m serving One Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish.  One Scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident or whatever else I feel deserved it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

We had an all too rare flash of what Mooney can do for the offense.  He looked dangerous on several of his catches finishing with 82 yards on 5 catches.  Foreman had almost identical production with 83 yards on 20 carries.  Foreman has made a pretty strong case for a role when Herbert and Roschon are at full strength.  Our Bearbon this week has to go to a guy I’ve criticized in the past, Cole Kmet.  His spectacular catch on the first TD deserved it on his own but he added another.  A full pour of Benchmark for number 85. 

Writing anything about Velus Jones’ poor play is almost as big a waste of resources as the continued insistence by the coaching staff to design plays for him.  At this point the defense is fully dependent on opponent errors to make any stops.  Sweat had some close calls but once again the Bears added nothing to their last in the league sack total.  For the second week in a row, we drink a strong scotch in concern for penalties.  From the offensive line starters, only Teven had no penalties accepted against him.  Patrick even doubled up for the second week in a row. Giving opponents half a field for free every week just doesn’t happen with well coached teams.  A small pour of Bruichladdich for all of us. 

It’s easy to not enjoy watching this team.  There are players though that just remind you how fun football can be.  Teven Jenkins is one of those guys for me.  He’s just a nasty guy who enjoys burying his guy.  We raise a Toppling Goliath Mornin’ Delight, a Kansas beer in honor of a fine Kansas boy.  

I am not one of those fans that cheer for the tank.  In a strange circumstance, tank and no-tank fans come together next week to cheer for a win over the Panthers.  They are looking good for a top 2 pick and another loss will certainly help.  I leave you in the capable psychedelic hands of Clapton.

The Bears run into a professional QB and lose.  We step up to the bar to drown our sadness.

After every game I’m serving one Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish.  One Scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident or whatever else I feel deserved it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

Last week, I pointed out Moore’s 54 yards keeping him on track for a career best year.  This week’s 55 yards didn’t hurt that.  Cole Kmet had his 3^rd best yardage game as a pro. I had to dig hard for those positives, neither of which seemed good enough for our Bearbon.  So we step out of the box and raise a small pour for the opening offensive play, Bagent to Mooney for 41 yards.  A great start to get Mooney involved, be aggressive downfield and establish that Bagent can throw more than 10 yards.  I know what came next but that moment was Bearbon worthy. 

On the flip side, there is no shortage of candidates for our scotch.  Penalties were again a huge issue with Patrick being a standout having back to back penalties for 20 yards.  Defensive and offensive play calling were also horrendous.  I’m looking at you deep pass followed by jet sweep, run up the middle and sack on 3^rd and long.  We raise our burning scotch to one player though, Velus Jones.  Jones gets plays scripted for him during the opening phases of games every week.  Yes, he gets mixed results with a mid-length gain here and there but he’s also shown incredibly poor skills.  That drop in the endzone, that I dare say my 8 year old son might have caught and he’s only playing soccer these days, is inexcusable.  Enough with giving the ball to guys who won’t do anything with it. 

Tyson Bagent is a back up QB and a good one at that.  Trying to make him out to be anything else is a burden he doesn’t deserve.  Fans expecting or fantasizing that he’s a franchise savior are deluding themselves.  With Fields out, he did what you would ask of QB2, fill in and don’t be the reason the team loses.  We raise a beer to the kid who should be on the roster for a long time to come.

Tarantino, the director, writes snappy and in my opinion brilliant dialogue.  Now imagine you show up at a Tarantino movie and he does 20 minutes of silent film to start the movie.  That is what Bears coaches are doing by using Trent Taylor, Velus Jones and everyone else in scripted plays before Moore.  I picture them in meetings talking themselves into that being a good idea and shake my head in annoyance.  So I leave you with one of only 2 kings I recognize, Dick Dale from Pulp Fiction. Hit me up on x (twitter) if you’re curious about the 2nd.

The Bears win over another reeling franchise.  We celebrate with three fine drinks.

After every game I’m serving one Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish.  One Scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident or whatever else I feel deserved it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

DJ Moore quietly amassing 54 yards receiving and still being on track for a 1500 yard season is beyond impressive.  The coaching staff putting together a gameplan that made sense for the available personnel also deserved a mention. Jaylon Johnson’s 2 picks may help him lock down an extension.  For me, it has to be Special Bagent Oso for whom we lift our Bearbon this week.  He wasn’t spectacular but he made the throws when it counted and even did his best JF1 impression with 24 yards on the ground. You’ll hear how this offense fits him better than Fields but I find that’s just an indictment on the coaches.  Here’s to the kid.

A win tends to hide flaws.  Eberflus carrying two timeouts into the locker room at halftime showed he’s just too conservative at times.  He’s playing to avoid losing rather than for the win.  An even bigger strike against the coaches are the 9 penalties for 110 yards.  The Raiders managed 244 yards of total offense.  The Bears handed them almost 50% of their production for free.  Borom stands out as a player who has developed a reputation.  The last holding call on him was weak but he won’t get the benefit of the doubt.  We drink a Balvenie 12-year old neat as we ponder the coaching staff’s future.

We raise a beer this week unquestionably to the Bears’ strongest position group, running back.  Foreman had 3 housecalls on Sunday while Evans chipped in 48 yards.  These are the 3^rd and 4^th string backs.  Travis Homer made a cameo but didn’t figure on the stat sheet.  Most teams would be happy to have two decent backs while the Bears’ wake up everyday with 5 of them.  We lift a Lone Star to honour Foreman and his Longhorn past.    

I lived in Cali for a very short time in the 90’s.  It happened to be right around the time this song came out.  I was so sick of the song and the band that I avoided them.  I’m here to say I was wrong.  If you ever get the chance to see the Peppers live, run don’t walk.  With the Chargers up next in primetime, I leave you with a tribute to my Cali past. 

Justin Fields gets hurt.  The Bears lose and the franchise reels once again.  Step up to the bar, let’s drink the sadness away.

After every game I’m serving one Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish.  One Scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident or whatever else I feel deserves it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

DJ Moore once again deserves mention for our Bearbon.  He took a beating catching 5 balls for 51 yards including 2 at a time when the rookie QB really needed them.  T.J Edwards would not be a bad choice either with 6 tackles, a sack and a forced fumble.  We’re drinking Bearbon to Foreman and Evans who combined for just under 100 yards in relief for the 3 backs ahead of them.  Running Back is not one of this team’s problems.    

My staff researchers have told me Bruichladdich X4 Quadrupled whiskey is the highest-proof single malt ever made.  We’re drinking that to the state of the Bears franchise.  Fields gets hurt possibly giving him less time to solidify his position as QB1 beyond this year.  It looks like the franchise will place its “we don’t fire coaches in-season” mantra above doing what most of us see as obvious.  Finally, my biggest fear is that organizationally, they may be heading to a second tank season.  Two high picks and an almost unavoidable coaching change means contention is once again a long way away. 

We raise a beer this week to Special Bagent Oso.  He came on in relief and put together a TD drive that raised my spirits and almost made me believe a win was possible.  I know he fumbled and threw the game-clinching pick but he’s a backup for a reason.  Bagent’s dad is apparently a 19-time arm wrestling world champion.  A Miller Lite to the kid with a championship pedigree. 

The Raiders are up next.  Interestingly, they will be one of the possible trade partners for any high draft pick.   McDaniels is unlikely to be around next year and Garoppolo hasn’t exactly set the world on fire.  They may be close to resetting as well.  Vegas is Vegas though so let’s imagine ourselves on the strip rolling nothing but 7’s on the come-out roll with a young Ann-Margret (google it).

For one half on Thursday, Bears fans saw what this team can be.  Halftime brought adjustments from Washington and regression from the Bears.  Surely, all of us have amazing booties by now from all the butt clenching we’ve done.  Let’s drink to the win.

Every week I’m serving one Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish.  One Scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident or whatever else I feel deserved it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

Last season for the Bears to win a game, Fields had to be the best player on the field.  Against Washington, Fields passed any eye test with accurate passes and his trademark athleticism.  At 15/29 passing however, this was not his best, meaning he can still play better.  We’ve lifted a Bearbon to DJ Moore before but with 8 catches for 230 yards and 3 touchdowns, there is no way we’re not doing it again here.  On a 1-4 team, he’s already at 531 yards and 5 TD’s, on pace for career highs. 

The defensive performance in the second half merited consideration for our burning scotch.  I don’t know if it’s going conservative, if the players have a letdown or if Eberflus fails to adjust his counterparts but after the Denver collapse, it was scary times for the Bears.  As the game went along though, injuries took the win for the burning scotch.  At kill the clock time, the Bears had only Blasingame available to carry the ball.  Add Lucas Patrick going down and yet more secondary injuries and this 10 day break could not come at a better time.  Let’s partake of the healing properties of highlands Scotch.

I became a Bears fan because of the ’85 Bears with Sweetness.  As I looked into the history of the team, I learned about Red Grange and Gayle Sayers but eventually I learned that Chicago is a defense sort of town.  No one personifies toughness and being a monster than Dick Butkus.  This site is called the Monsters of the Midwest for a reason.  We raise a Pabst Blue Ribbon to the original monster; may he rest in peace.

If you love music, as I do, there are seminal albums and songs that stick with you.  A ten-day break for the Bears brings you my favourite song from Pearl Jam’s Ten album.  Hit DJ2 on the jukebox for a modern-day classic.

My Pops tells a story about playing volleyball in school.  One game, he was playing so bad that one of his teammates walked over to him, grabbed him by the hand and suggested he would help the team more if he just got off the court and prayed for them to win.  I wondered this week whether Bears Coach Eberflus is a praying man. 

Every week I’m serving 1 Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish.  1 Scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident or whatever else I feel deserved it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

To quote the great Crash Davis “Relax, this game is fun, let’s have some fun out here”.  This is what I was thinking as I watched the Bears offense look unstoppable.  A 300-yard passe and both a 100-yard receiver and rusher are usually a recipe for winning games.  For the purposes of our Bearbon, I’m going to ignore everything that came later and drink to those fun times.  It was long after the game that I saw the clip below showing some of the players were having a good time too.  

The obvious place to start our burning scotch is the decision to forego the 35-yard field goal in the 4^th but I want to take you somewhere else.  The Bears had 3 quarters of the defense giving up 7 points. I went back and checked every Broncos drive where they kept scoreless, they had at least one and usually more than one penalty.  The Bears defense is entirely dependent on the opponent beating themselves.  The Broncos stopped doing it and pulled out a win.  A competent coaching staff would have considered this a reason to accrue points over everything.  A scotch for all of us who believed a defensive minded head coach would be better than this.

I have not given up on Fields.  There is no way he was going to have his biggest passing day and an 80% completion percentage without me raising a beer to him.  The young man showed up.  Yes, I am aware it was the Broncos but you play the teams they put in front of you.  A crisp, cold Miller Lite for QB1. 

The commanders are up next for the Bears.  I learned a while back that Dave Grohl grew up in DC and started playing drums there.  Dave and the Foo Fighters did a series of documentaries with one featuring my favourite US city, with my favourite blues style and my favourite football team.  Dave wrote this song for that documentary.  Hit 312 on the jukebox and turn it up. 

The Bears lose big to Kansas City after a tumultuous week.  Step up to the bar and let’s drink away the sorrow.

Every week I’m serving one Bearbon for the best thing I saw during the week, preferably smooth with a nice finish.  One scotch that burns the back of the throat but doesn’t stop you from loving it.  We’ll then raise a beer to a player, play, incident or whatever else I feel deserved it.  Lastly, I’ll leave you with a song from the Jukebox.

I could sugar coat it and tell you that there were lots of good things during that game in KC.  There was really just one so that’s our Bearbon for the week.  Despite everything going on around the Bears, DJ Moore is on pace for 960 yards.  Coming close to a 1000 yard season on this team would be an amazing accomplishment.  We drink a Bearbon to his TD. 

Unlike our Bearbon, there were lots of candidates for a burning scotch.  Another inept coaching performance, getting blown out by more than 30 points and a sub 100 yard passing day for Fields were leading candidates.  I don’t think it’s hyperbole to say the entire culture around the Bears is what has fans drinking hard liquor.  Alan Williams resigning under a cloud of mystery and beat writers stirring the pot over Fields’ comments on coaching are things that just don’t happen around competent organizations.  This team doesn’t need a band-aid.  It needs surgery, preferably removing some dead wood. Three fingers of 18-year-old scotch for all of us. 

Like most Bears fans, I fall back on history very often.  With the absolute butt kicking the Vikings took on the weekend, there was another chance to celebrate what this franchise can be.  We raise a beer to the 1940 Bears who hold on to the record for most points ever scored with 73 to win the NFL championship.  It doesn’t hurt that it’s put a divisional rival into a tailspin.

1% of a billion is 10 million.  Forbes estimates the Bears had operating income of $203 million last year along with having the 2^nd least amount of debt in the league.  They are valued at 6.3 billion dollars meaning a 1% increase in value represents 63 million dollars to the McCaskeys.  Their valuation grew by 9% last year or over ½ a billion dollars.  All this to say, that you would have to be an incredibly bad business person to sell the team.  I think of this every time I see a suggestion that the only solution to the franchise’s problems is for the owners to sell.  Trust me or math, either way, it’s not happening.

https://www.forbes.com/lists/nfl-valuations/?sh=2503d7011738https://x.com/bbrech/status/1706071348483588352?s=20

Place your quarter in the jukebox for the perfect baseline to accompany this economics lesson.